The garden hose

So. my hubby was going to mow the grass a few weeks ago and I reminded him to roll up the hose cause it would be hard to see in the grass and he would run over it.I have told him to roll it back up when he is finished with it and he never listens. My hubby has a severe case of wife deafness and didnt roll up the hose. And just like I figured, over it he went and chopped the hose in pieces. Being the good wife I am, I picked at him about it for about a week then went and bought a new hose.
Fast forward till a day I was off from work and was going to mow some so he wouldnt have so much to mow when he got home. ( our yard keeps increasing in size , I swear it does!!!!!!) anyways, I pile my fat self on the mower and am happily running around the yard in the earnhardt gear the hubby has told me to never mow in and then I heard it.. CHOMPCHOMP... I look back , wondering if that was the neighbor I just ran over and see little peices of the garden hose.I had watered flowers the nite before and I hadnt rolled up the hose. Well, I knew there was NO WAY I could tell him what I had done cause I had picked at him about it for so long when he did it do I jumped in the car and run over to the closest hardware store and got a new hose. Was sooooo proud of myself that I had gotten away with it. Till I got home.
We had used the other hose for a few weeks ( before I made it into straws) and it was all dirty and stuff and the new hose damn near glowed it was so clean!!!so I drug it up and down the driveway in the dirt about 10 times and then pulled it through the grass some so it would look like it had been used alot. I Knew I had it knocked then. He would never know I had done the same stupid thing he had. Was sooo pleased at my self for being so smart!!!!
The next day, he is going to water the flowers and off across the yard he goes , dragging the hose with him. I am standing in the window watching him and thinking all along just how smart I really am ,,,,, UNTIL,, He ran outa hose way before he ran outa flowerbed. . He couldnt get to the other end of the flower bed with the hose like he had 2 days ago.. I watch him out the window, pulling on the hose so hard that I thought he was gonna drag the house up the hill by the hose.. He came back to see if it was snagged on something.I couldnt figure out what was wrong.. Then it hit me! We had had a 30 foot hose in the beginning and me, in my rush to get the replacement hose, had bought a 15 footer.... So.... I go out the door, dreading what I had to do. He is standing there with the hose in his hand, looking back at where its connected to the house and you can tell by the look on his face, he has no clue what is going on. I tried to tell him that I had heard on the radio that if you left a garden hose lying in the sun, it would shrink.. He didnt fall for that one.. So I told him the little drizzle of rain we had the nite before caused it to draw up.. Nope, didnt work. All at once, he looked at me and I swear I saw a light bulb go off in his head. " you did it to didnt you. come on fess up, you ran it over too didnt you" what could I say. I just dropped my head and turned and crawled back into the house..